Well, it's been a while since I've written. A long time. It's interesting thinking about all the changes that have happened in my life, more so to me. I've lost friends, chances, family members, and dreams. I've moved into the dorms and started college. I've become something different than I was. With in each instance in life, we change even just a little bit. Each day offers with it the chance and opportunity to change, to make a difference. I'm finding myself, and I hope that I am truly finding God in the process. I want to start posting songs that fit my mood at the moment. For the second week of classes it was the song "Millionaire" by FFH. I took it as a comfort, I still do in some ways. Music is odd for me. Certain songs get stuck in my head and they help to define me at that moment. I was lonely, and bored. But, more so depressed. I felt like I could do nothing, that I couldn't succeed and helped me to see and to feel, that it didn't matter, because I can do whatever it is God wants me to do.
Right now, the song that is in my heart is "Everlasting" by Hillsong. It helps me to think. It's a comfort. I don't quite know why. I do know that it reminds me of the power of God. It reminds me of why I'm here. It reminds me of His essence. Oh, how so easily I forget. I need to remember what God has for me. That He cares for me.
When I was getting ready to leave for college and I was depressed for one reason or another, my mom had shared with me the verse that she had chosen for me when she chose to give birth to me.
Jeremiah 29:11
"'For I know the plans that I have for you,' declares the LORD,' plans for welfare and not for calamity to give you a future and a hope."
I need to remember.. I need to keep in mind my God. I need to keep in mind my faith. The fact that He has a plan for me. That I do have a hope. Even in the darkest of times, that my heart is guarded by His peace.
I pray for strength and wisdom. I pray that I might be strengthened. I pray that I might make some true friends who will walk with me in the faith.
